27 July - Mad TV princesses & Millionaire weirdos
Picture.. Sicily 1933 ... No er, that was the Golden Girls. Which reminds me I liked shows about old women before I started training to be one.
Ok, picture: high flying exec at TV co. Just divorced - she had married him sort of just to spite her father who said ‘Not right for you’. A couple of kids later stays in marriage for them. Eventually can’t stand it, kids older, long drawn out battle to share the spoils. She’s in new million £ house in Fulham. Flying off here and there to TV festivals picking up lovers as she goes. She currently has 4 on the go but for some reason keeps trying to entice a friend of mine with ‘Why don’t you come with me to Johannesburg or Vegas and so on’. My boy/friend keeps saying 'no' for the simple reason he doesn’t fancy her (nothing about how mad she is, shouldn’t that be the main reason?).
Recently she was in NYC, in a swanky hotel and after her 6am session at the gym, another early riser master of the universe offers her a coffee, then asks for a drink later on. She accepts, and before she knows it (well after she’s googled him and found out he’s worth a few millions in Washington– darn, can’t remember what business he’s in) asks her to join him in Boulder Colorado for the w/end. She says no, and no, but then probably thinks ‘What the heck!’ He sends a limo to pick her up and of course she finds out that she’s booked into the same room as him. WOMEN, WAKE UP? What did you think he was getting you? Another suite? She argues she wants another room, there isn’t one, so she stays. WOMEN! If you really don’t want to sleep with him there are other hotels in town, stop this silly charade. You're high flying TV exec in your forties, surely you can sort out other arrangements or get your PA to do so.
So, they go to sleep and nothing happens. Women mostly always say this about sharing a bed with someone who they're basically telling you they didn’t much like, ie. they’re testing your reactions. Of course they slept with him, they just don’t want you to think they were slutting it. Like my friend F. who always admits to going down on them and viceversa but denies penetration as if that made her less reproachable in the eyes of whom exactly? Some mother superior? But I digress.
I presume they had dinner and eventually made it to the room where she discovers he goes to sleep naked, but with a t-shirt OVER HIS HEAD. Why? 'Because I can only sleep this way' he says. Instead of checking out next day, TV exec proposes they do some activity. He says 'no' to cycling BECAUSE IT’S DANGEROUS! She says 'Ok let’s go for a drive.' He says HE CAN’T DRIVE (an American, go figure). I don’t know what they did for fun but later on she admits she had sex with him and says it wasn’t great (ie. euphemism for total crap) and that at dinner he told her ‘Babs, I really, really like you, but you also irritate me a lot’. Charming first date/days type of talk but he’s Jewish, perhaps if you imagine this said with an East Coast accent she found it funny, or perhaps being a powerful exec, having someone tell you that you are an irritating bitch is actually a sign of ‘Wow, this guy knows how to control me, it's what I liked in my ex husband after all....'
She didn’t however reply ‘Bertie, you’re shit in bed and you’re a weirdo who goes to sleep with a t-shirt on his head, get lost'.
Oh no, she’s now sort of seeing him, you know because trying to have a relationship London/Washington is fun. It has to be. Right? And she's still after my friend. In fact she told him this story as a sort of courting ritual no doubt and is asking him to have a joint birthday party with her. I mean... they have no other friends in common so she probably wants him to picture himself in her swanky home and get used to the idea this could be his big bathroom and this could be his large master bedroom. Clearly the woman will eventually bunny boil someone and I'll let you know who/when. Hope it's not my friend.
Ps. I got out of a certain career path many years ago so as not to have the remotest chance of turning into the above anectdote.
Ok, picture: high flying exec at TV co. Just divorced - she had married him sort of just to spite her father who said ‘Not right for you’. A couple of kids later stays in marriage for them. Eventually can’t stand it, kids older, long drawn out battle to share the spoils. She’s in new million £ house in Fulham. Flying off here and there to TV festivals picking up lovers as she goes. She currently has 4 on the go but for some reason keeps trying to entice a friend of mine with ‘Why don’t you come with me to Johannesburg or Vegas and so on’. My boy/friend keeps saying 'no' for the simple reason he doesn’t fancy her (nothing about how mad she is, shouldn’t that be the main reason?).
Recently she was in NYC, in a swanky hotel and after her 6am session at the gym, another early riser master of the universe offers her a coffee, then asks for a drink later on. She accepts, and before she knows it (well after she’s googled him and found out he’s worth a few millions in Washington– darn, can’t remember what business he’s in) asks her to join him in Boulder Colorado for the w/end. She says no, and no, but then probably thinks ‘What the heck!’ He sends a limo to pick her up and of course she finds out that she’s booked into the same room as him. WOMEN, WAKE UP? What did you think he was getting you? Another suite? She argues she wants another room, there isn’t one, so she stays. WOMEN! If you really don’t want to sleep with him there are other hotels in town, stop this silly charade. You're high flying TV exec in your forties, surely you can sort out other arrangements or get your PA to do so.
So, they go to sleep and nothing happens. Women mostly always say this about sharing a bed with someone who they're basically telling you they didn’t much like, ie. they’re testing your reactions. Of course they slept with him, they just don’t want you to think they were slutting it. Like my friend F. who always admits to going down on them and viceversa but denies penetration as if that made her less reproachable in the eyes of whom exactly? Some mother superior? But I digress.
I presume they had dinner and eventually made it to the room where she discovers he goes to sleep naked, but with a t-shirt OVER HIS HEAD. Why? 'Because I can only sleep this way' he says. Instead of checking out next day, TV exec proposes they do some activity. He says 'no' to cycling BECAUSE IT’S DANGEROUS! She says 'Ok let’s go for a drive.' He says HE CAN’T DRIVE (an American, go figure). I don’t know what they did for fun but later on she admits she had sex with him and says it wasn’t great (ie. euphemism for total crap) and that at dinner he told her ‘Babs, I really, really like you, but you also irritate me a lot’. Charming first date/days type of talk but he’s Jewish, perhaps if you imagine this said with an East Coast accent she found it funny, or perhaps being a powerful exec, having someone tell you that you are an irritating bitch is actually a sign of ‘Wow, this guy knows how to control me, it's what I liked in my ex husband after all....'
She didn’t however reply ‘Bertie, you’re shit in bed and you’re a weirdo who goes to sleep with a t-shirt on his head, get lost'.
Oh no, she’s now sort of seeing him, you know because trying to have a relationship London/Washington is fun. It has to be. Right? And she's still after my friend. In fact she told him this story as a sort of courting ritual no doubt and is asking him to have a joint birthday party with her. I mean... they have no other friends in common so she probably wants him to picture himself in her swanky home and get used to the idea this could be his big bathroom and this could be his large master bedroom. Clearly the woman will eventually bunny boil someone and I'll let you know who/when. Hope it's not my friend.
Ps. I got out of a certain career path many years ago so as not to have the remotest chance of turning into the above anectdote.
posted by Lisa Taylor @ 6:43 AM
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