10 February - Broadband & Puss

The joys of broadband… Toph finally discovers EVERYTHING he's been missing.
The background is that when he rang up his net provider to upgrade to broadband, they kept telling him they couldn’t find him as a customer. He repeatedly insisted that he had been with them for years. At some point a brighter spark asked ‘Hang on… are you on dial up?’. Which he was. They had not thought of checking that list of customers being that even grannies up and down the land are on fast modems. I bet they had some laughs after they took his details, about this luddite who was still dialling up. So the day came he got the faster web. Understandably he had not checked out the ‘latest’ development as they’d take forever to be viewed. So a happy morning was spent with me doing tutorials on Myspace and Youtube and Itunes and Flickr. I showed him how to go off on various tangents, made him listen to music, watch vids etc and he declared ‘I can see how people don’t go out anymore if they have this’. Or ‘Who needs TV’. Doh! It was a sort of Crocodile Dundee moment.

Of course the next thing to do was to type in some porn word and see where that took us. He was a bit surprised that I said ‘anal’, so I changed that to ‘hairy pussies’ as well, nothing else came into my head there and then and I hardly ever come across one. And we were off. Bewildering. Overload. Do all these people make money out of it? Does everyone in the world work in porn? It seemed that way. Does anyone know how to refine the search? I mean, it wasn't just hairy that came up, it was a selection. That sort of is a waste of time when one is busy.