Diary of Lisa Taylor, reluctantly 42 (and a half)

Or.. 'f.ck me I'm forty.. two.. and a half', though can look 38 on a - not so deluded - good day. Or 'How to reconcile a well experienced mind trapped in a still - but for how long? – youthful body.' Don't have the 30somethings angst/problems, neither have the resigned (?) ageing baby-boomers in safe family territory outlook yet. Here's how I cope, one day all sexy women will get old... but never invisible. © Lisa Taylor 2005/6/7/8/9. Jeez.. so much for the 42 and-a-half delusion

Thursday, March 01, 2007

27 February - Time off ... never

Early to bed. Catch up on myself. Another weekend involving too many activities. And if we start at last Thursday... went to a book reading/music night. No dancing, just a lot of straining to hear what writers were reading. Bad acoustics.
Went to a dinner with new people some of whom sometimes live and work in Angola. Failed to watch Blood Diamond first so we'd have some background on conflict diamonds but went one futher and printed off UN papers on the subject. Very dry. All say the same thing. Will I actually one day refuse a diamond on account of it being drenched in blood? Not very likely and I do believe there's conflict coffee and conflict other stuff.
Then went to the Cobden for a birthday. Young people whose fathers are famous. Nice if you can get to that position, though potentially frought with years of psychotherapy, so I shall stop being envious. B'day girl couldn't care less about our presence as by this point she was trying to hook dashing older guy. It was past midnight so not long to go. Danced for a bit. Saw dashing older guy all on his own.
Went to see a movie, The Good Shepherd, far too long and miscast. Went to see a gig at the Met Bar, arrived for the last number (bloody parking in Mayfair, what was I thinking), had the pleasure of paying a tenner for a vodka and tonic and a fiver for a beer. Stayed far too long to watch the goings ons of nobodies (there's a reason I haven't been here for years I realise) and manage to have one of those arguments in cars complete with tears. All resolved I'm glad to say or just postponed for another late night car journey.
Went to watch a BBC2 docu in the house of its director /producer. Thank god it was a fab political one that left you still wondering about what happened. Aren't these investigative things interesting? Suicides, why don't they really leave unquestionable notes so nobody has to be left in any doubt about their intentions? And whilst they're at it, can they make them less easy to suppress than a mere note (see The Good Shepherd). How about setting up a video camera, filming your goodbyes and having them broadcast before you actually top yourself so we know you really meant it that way.
Managed to turn down a great job, but hopefully passed it on to a friend. Maybe it will still be there in a year's time.
Discussed moving to a new house.
Went to some exercise class.
Read the papers.
Painted nails and toenails.
Had the benefit of lots of loverboy's attention.
Now I need to sleep.

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