18 March - First Quarter Losses

Time to tot up 1st quarter losses. They are: a beanie hat dropped on skiing holiday, not a favourite. A ring, not a favourite either, but one that had been sought out repeatedly (my sister had bought me the wrong size) in trips to Italy, Hong Kong and finally found in Geneva. However, despite the cost, it started to tarnish almost immediately and had planned to take it back to Swatch shop in London. If I had taken it back last week (after I found where I had put the receipt) I would not have lost it a few days later by leaving it on the sink of a restaurant bathroom. What is the moral there? I hate, hate taking rings off, I never do. One good reason for buying gold ie it doesn’t tarnish or oxydise and there I go, take this one off to ‘preserve’ it and leave it behind. Not found of course.

The moral maybe is I didn’t care much for either object, beanie or ring, and they were taken from me to prove this. But the thing is that I’ve thought of nothing but the ring for days. Can’t buy it again as it was discontinued line and not easy to find. And as extra punishment for being distracted, have not worn a ring on that finger since so I notice even more how bare that hand is.

Then the other night I slept at friend’s house and her dog ate a cherished diaphanous light cashmere top (Nicole Fahri) which I had left on the bed. Dog is able to jump on bed and indeed came into the bedroom wanting to play – at 6am!- and I shooshed him away. Never noticed he took the top till it was found properly mauled later. Not even my creativity with adornments can mask the huge holes though some Japanese girl probably would think it's deliberately chewed. The thing is, ever since I had that top, it had two, make it three small holes/tears, which I hid with broaches, but eventually I spent a good time on Sunday last to finally fix/repair/mend it after seeking out wool of the same pale minty green colour. What is the significance of this? Either fix it immediately and have time to enjoy it or don’t bother, it will be too late? Two days after you fix what’s broken it breaks even more? Any parallels with relationships here? Help? I need explanations.

I also seem to have lost a friend, hopefully temporarily, over an offer of help her self esteem, that didn’t go down too well. Right now I bemoan the cashmere top the most. Shallow? moi?