Diary of Lisa Taylor, reluctantly 42 (and a half)

Or.. 'f.ck me I'm forty.. two.. and a half', though can look 38 on a - not so deluded - good day. Or 'How to reconcile a well experienced mind trapped in a still - but for how long? – youthful body.' Don't have the 30somethings angst/problems, neither have the resigned (?) ageing baby-boomers in safe family territory outlook yet. Here's how I cope, one day all sexy women will get old... but never invisible. © Lisa Taylor 2005/6/7/8/9. Jeez.. so much for the 42 and-a-half delusion

Thursday, May 19, 2011

20 May - Test & Osterone

It's sort of amusing in a way that one day you're considering you may have some aspect of pancreatic cancer (and for those few people who actualy know me and read this blog occasionally, please don't panic, I may be exaggerating for my own comedy purposes) and the next you're seeing a professor expert in 'pause (I will not call it with its full name which I think is just not apt) and she recommends testosterone patches /gel to bring libido back to former levels.

So you are at the chemist getting said meds and get told by the helpful assistant that it will cost £100 for 3 months. Considering that the as yet not fully diagnosed 'shadow on pancreas' is 1.5cm long and don't think they'd wheel me in surgery that fast to remove it, I am sure I'll pass the 3 months and it's worth turning into a wild sex kitten in the run up to god knows what. As a friend commented, that's a pound a day. Bargain.

Not sure radiotherapy kills libido as much as chemo does, but I read that people don't have the energy to lift a fork so imagine that if I start sickening, I wouldn't stretch to a bit of cocksucking or other. Yes give me the stuff. That way if I then need surgery and/or die, Toph can remember me up to the very last moment prior to sad hospital visits as his ever hot chick.

In a way this little conundrum is no different to when a 70 something relative needed expensive dentistry, am talking over 10k, and she was considerin how much longer she has to live vs the outlay. I advised that getting to 80 these days is relatively established and so it worked out to 3 quid a day or so to be mindful of nearerst and dearest who would like to see her smile as opposed to keeping tight lips to hide the repair work needed.


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