22 June - imelda & bunions

I get teased at work for my Imelda sized shoe collection. In my defence today I replied that I am fast developing one of the genetic inheritances from my mother, ie. bunions and that I’m making the most of shoes now before I have to switch to wearing clogs or trainers in, say, ten years? Now, that would not ever have been the answer I gave until…now. It’s an ageing/ageist answer. Why did this happen? Why didn’t I say instead “Having my toes sucked is one the things I like the best, hence shoes are meant to draw attention to this most erotic zone of mine”. A bit longwinded, but much more interesting or at least bound to leave colleague speechless for a few seconds – if male colleague I would have looked him not in the eye and am sure he’d have died of embarrassment as the mention of toe sucking had made something grow and that would teach him. I don’t comment on guys shirts around here.
I hate the idea of bunions, though on the other side, paternal hair stayed dark till his sixties, so have inherited that and hardly any whites have penetrated the highlighted mane. This simply means I don’t have to rush to cover the re-growth v. often. However it’s proved impossible to ask father if er… other white hair was late in colonising nether regions. This is another of those things that you worry about past 40. Apparently, white hair is more likely to grow straight so if you’re curly it definitely sticks out, a Caribbean friend pointed this out saying it really affects her. I guess not having saved money for a pension should worry me more but you know what… it doesn’t. Ok, there’s waxing (in case any males are reading this, no, you can't dye your pubic hair) but an ageing bald crotch will hardly be more attractive than one with white hair, male or female. Scary image just flashed into my head. Time for a coffee.