10 November- Shit & Serenity

A top tip. It’s always good to have a friend or two who’s 5 to 10 years older than yourself. The things they tell you! A fiftysomething revealed an episode of incontinence a few months back and it wasn’t pretty to hear. My first thought was ‘Isn’t that supposed to happen, like, when you’re 80???’ And so now I can add it to the list of worries for next decade. Great. However, my latest missive from another nearly fifty friend who lives abroad is that with hormones abating, there is serenity at hand. All she has time for apart from working and dealing with some increasing health ailments is is walks on the beach (she’s near one in California), reading and eating and meeting up with friends. Not much is said about the boyfriend (an addition of only a year or two). So yes, no more feverish correspondence on what he did or didn’t do, what he said or didn’t say, where it’s all going and how one was kept up all night and ravished in some unusual manner. No, nothing about him at all. Serenity she calls it. So all my current tossing and turning (actually I sleep very well, I do all my worrying awake which is a waste of time) will cease and will be substituted with serenity. But that doesn’t sound exciting. Does one notice when the dramas suddenly disappear or is it a slow, imperceptible process or one where the thought that previously worried you arises and this time it simply gets forgotten or not dealt with?