2 September - Pumpkin & Seaweed

Of course there's a trace of schizophrenia in all of us. I think it's manageable if there's only two mad people in your head and not ten. Though maybe the definition of schizophrenic is in fact at least three. Never mind. I wonder if this qualifies: in a typical scenario I start to cook two very different items of food. Well, say one is actually cooking - roasted pumpkin - and the other one is merely soaking - arame' sea weed. Both to be had with something else I haven't decided yet, some pasta or some rice or some salad. But I run out of ideas and end up combining the two in the end. Weird combination? You bet. But at least it's healthy and in some trendy new restaurant they'd probably tout this as their dish du jour. But, it occurs to me you can only eat this strangely assorted foods at home if you're on your own. Imagine prospective boyfriend witnessing this. He'd run a mile as in... 'before I know it, she'll try to convert me to salads and greens only'. But... my acquired wisdom is that you can screw up on the meal you serve them, so long as you finish it with icecream or some other pudding. This reminds them of childhood and all is well again.

I realise am the same with books ie. reading a chapter of one and then switching to another. Some get finished, some take considerably longer. Take Umberto Eco. Five years after starting on 'The Island of the Day Before'... I finally finished it. Admittedly the main difficulty was in remembering every time I picked it up what had gone on before. I never did remember, hence so much unnecessary re-reading. The problem with multiple narratives across centuries. Don't even ask me for a synopsis though am sure there's one on Amazon. I did ask myself what was he writing it for? To say what exactly? On top of not being a satisfying read it taught me nothing. Can't even remember name of main character. So I promptly donated it to a charity shop but it's still there after weeks. Clearly London is full of smarter people than myself who know better than waste valuable time on Mr Eco and his hundreds of pages. A man after my heart is instead GG Marquez, who in old age has gone for slim volumes, 130 delicious pages, hurrah! His 'Memories of my melancholy Whores' is a book after Lisa's concerns, ie. ageing and sex. Unfortunately I cannot imagine the plot of the book reversed with a 90 year old woman central character obsessed with a 15 year old virgin boy. It would be too weird. It would never happen. Oh that he did! I'd be happy to get old then.
Note to karmic re-incarnation committee: I would like my next time on this earth as a man. Please pretty please. I simply have to know. Do furnish me with a functioning and sizeable cock of course. I don't want to spend my entire time licking muff to compensate.