17 May - Jeans & Arse

I don’t do jeans… by which I mean that I haven’t bought a pair since I was 13 and lusted after a specific pair of Wranglers. Well, they couldn’t have been Levi’s because that’s what everyone around me wanted and I had to be different. Nothing changed here. Subsequent use has been rare, don’t wear them on holiday, don’t wear them to clubs, don’t wear them at w/ends and there’s no nasty picture of me with stone washed denim ha ha ha or ripped denim more ha ha ha or skinny ones. I do have inherited a few pairs over the years though and am safe in the belief that my specimen defy changing fashions. Can’t go wrong with a pair of darker denim, no weird bottom Helmut Langs can you? And I hate prominent logos or even small ones so that’s a bit limiting. They get worn when I absolutely must not appear to be too different and for example arrive at cute picnic (a splendid opportunity to wear something pretty whilst posing on a lawn if you ask me), but all present mothers clearly think that Sunday is just another get stuff out of the washing machine, change nappies day and there they are, all in jeans and just about not crappy t-shirt.

However, am in the market for sprucing up Toph’s jeans -well what he has does not display his pert bottom to my liking, hate baggy - and now I understand all the fuss about brands and finding the one one likes or has a good fit for you and therefore is worth stupid money. Toph is not even involved in the search, as far as he’s concerned his two favourite pairs are fine by him, but I hanker about a different shade of denim and a different weight to the fabric, only I never seem to see it. Though am certain I will know they’re the ones when I see them if that makes sense. I look at jeans displayed say in Gap (got to start wide with the search) and just looking at them hanging there I want to turn out of the shop. Hideous, all of them. I have a feeling that the ones I want may be found in places like D&G but he’d abhor them, Toph is not David Beckham (tk god!). Or maybe Prada do some understated ones? J would know but the problem then becomes footwear, you don’t wear Prada jeans with trainers no no no and Toph hates stylish shoes. … As to people who are obsessed and declare they have dozens of pairs. I simply don’t understand. The search is keeping me nicely preoccupied and I distract myself with it when am avoiding buying for myself.