Diary of Lisa Taylor, reluctantly 42 (and a half)

Or.. 'f.ck me I'm forty.. two.. and a half', though can look 38 on a - not so deluded - good day. Or 'How to reconcile a well experienced mind trapped in a still - but for how long? – youthful body.' Don't have the 30somethings angst/problems, neither have the resigned (?) ageing baby-boomers in safe family territory outlook yet. Here's how I cope, one day all sexy women will get old... but never invisible. © Lisa Taylor 2005/6/7/8/9. Jeez.. so much for the 42 and-a-half delusion

Friday, November 05, 2010

3 November - Old Age

will not be pretty chez Taylor. Today I gave Toph irritated answers. Goes like this. We all have very precisely shaped characters/personalities/skills. I am one of those who tell you once, expect you've heard me/understood me. You tell me once, and I got it, filed it, acted on it or diarised it to act on it etc. That's why it's super hard to deal with people who repeat or check stuff. By all means, check once but not twice. So whenever a certain friend for example texts me or calls me to double check if I'll be round hers at 6pm as previously arranged... I get the hackles up instantly. Why check? When have I not ever been where I told you I'll be at the right time unless I've given you notice that I can't be etc etc.?
So, poor Toph knows I'll be out at a show with some friends which most likely will end at 10.30 unless I go backstage in which case I'll let him know that I'll be back at whatever time. Himself will be home at 8ish as he has already informed me. So why call me and tell me again?
You can say why get annoyed over such small things but ... I do , you do, we all do.
Perhaps I should be more in a hurry to see him since he's been away for 5/6 days? Perhaps.... But am really looking forward to the show and the friends. Mainly because they're a more rare occasion and with him we're now on year 5. That's the way it goes. Had always read about it and it's true. You just can't keep the same level of excitedness about the routine in your life. Don't want anything else but neither can I treat this like it's more special than it is... So it must mean that going forward ten years I'll be unapprocheable in terms of irritable levels and I'll care not a lot for my relationship. It's possible...

I think Stephen Fry is wrong to say that women want sex less than men, I think they want the same amount but not as they get older... unless women are on HRT or other, then they want it less or they want it renewed that's why people go off with younger lovers all around no? and in some cultures there's an old wife and a few younger models to service the man. One always feels the older wife is to be pitied but I don't think necessarily. She lives in the same nice house, she is who she is, she just doesn't need to have sex just to service him, since she probably doesn't get as much pleasure out of it as she did in her twenties or thirties. Anyone out there with an opinion? Mr Fry also forgets that women can't very well run off to hampsted heath to have it off with strangers, much as they may like to, as the social restrictions on us are much more monumentally crushing than they are on men. Gay or otherwise. Wasn't that long ago we were mere chattels and still are in various parts of the world.


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