21 May - Flats & Heels

I’ve clearly shocked my girlfriend G. with the simplest of phone exchanges.
‘So what did Toph get you?’
I list a bunch of things, this and that and that ‘And something I can’t mention…’
‘Oh, a vibrator?’
‘No darling have those already, no, something I’ll tell you some other time after the event, but he also got me a lovely pair of shoes’.
‘Oh darling, Loubutins?’
‘No, Clarks.’
There is a long silence whilst she processes the information which clearly doesn’t compute. So I add:
‘I asked for them, they’re cute, white, with crossover straps and buckles and I wanted them for travels, as I don’t do trainers and I think flip flops are for the beach and these can work with trousers or a dress, though they’re a bit nursey comfy what can you do, I can’t do Liz Hurley high heels on the cobblestones or Ravello or Taormina, I’d fall over’

But yes, it happens, mystique ebbs away and you get… comfortable. I’m sure I’ll look ok and will only use them in emergencies. Plus Toph is genuinely finding them sexy. Deep down he likes a girl in a vest (an Urban Outfitters one was included in his gifts), jeans and flat shoes. That’s what I get for having Carrie Bradshaw as my spiritual guide… a guy who likes girls the likes of which don’t even figure in that show. Ever. Or maybe they’re the waitresses, the studenty ones in the caffs, not the done up to the nines ones in the clubs. But hey… I should take it as an omen that he won’t mind too much the progression to retirement home attire that will assail me oh, in thirty years or so. He loves smart too but is just happier out of smart. Justifies him wearing his favourite faded t-shirts. I once had a boyfriend who was always in casuals and blurted out 'How can you go out with a scruff like me?'. To which the only reply was 'Your huge penis darling, oh, and your intellect'.

However, what I fail to tell G. is that the following day, I went into Clarks again and got a pair of cute red flat sort of Todd’s style driving shoes. Just to walk to work you understand…. And they have a cute grosgrain bow that I can change for a velvet one of a different colour if I want to match them to some other outfit.

To be honest I was surprised at how mobbed the shop was. They all seemed Spaniards and Italians in there. I wonder why. Maybe they don’t do Clarks or comfy shoes in those countries. But surely they do? Or maybe Geoxx are too expensive? It has to be said that the range was reasonably modern in design. Oh there I go again, trying to justify rubber shoes.

Oh dear, just had a thought. In some 'Summer/travel clothes' storage box, I have two pairs of air Nike sole design flat shoes bought in HK when I was thinking the same thougth 'Need some plain and stylish flats to use on holiday /go to work'. Both are black. So now I have four brand new flats to go to work with, plus all the other crappy flats that these are meant to supersede - you know, the silly ballerinas you buy here and there when your feet hurt and you dive into any shop. So, two things here, memory fading, and the worrisome trend for admiring/purchasing flats. The thing that's even worse is that I often get into work and fail to swap them for the heels and spend the day in them. Which is plainly wrong as my clothes don't match flats on the whole. I need to re-progam back to the 'younger me'.